Sunday, December 4, 2011

A Day Off (Embracing the Non-Diabetes in Me)

I should feel guilt.

Saturday was mine.  All mine.  I woke up, quickly got ready, and bounded out the door, all of the while, smiling and giggling. 

I had a day off.

A real day off.

The kind where you are free to do whatever you want.

And in this case, I wanted to spend one day with one of my dearest friends, doing nothing except being ourselves. 

We started off in a little coffee shop with decadent espresso and delicious asparagus souffles. 

I didn't test my blood sugar, count carbs or dose Apidra.

Instead, I savoured my food.  I actually ate it slowly while it was still hot and I didn't try to hide the chocolate shavings on my coffee from anyone because I was worried that they would sample it and I wouldn't know how many carbs it was. 

It was delicious too.

After that, my dear friend and I headed over to one of our favorite shopping locations.  We parked our car and started to walk.  Not just a hurried trip to get what we needed and go home... but a leisurely stroll through all of the aisles and reaching out to touch and admire the beauty of the items, even the ones made out of glass.

An hour later and I didn't have to re-check my blood sugar to see what the latte or the extra walking had done to my numbers.  I knew I felt good and I could simply trust that reaction.

Shortly after noon, my tummy growled a bit and reminded me that I should probably think about lunch.

I ignored it.

I didn't worry about a crash.  I just kept shopping. 

Around two o'clock, we decided to eat and picked a place known for fresh salads.  But only because we were in the mood for crunchy greens, not because we had too.

When the salad arrived, I made sure to not count each of the clementine wedges or the cranberries.  Instead, I just focused on stabbing them together on my fork, so that I could relish the flavors co-mingling on my palette. 

When we were done, we simply wanted some raspberry chocolate.  So we got it and ate it.  Without hesitation.  No weighing or measuring.  Just enjoying.

And then we shopped some more.  Driving around our town and stopping at any boutique that we desired.  We laughed until our sides hurt and then laughed even more.

Because it felt that good.

Later that evening, neither of us was hungry enough for dinner, so we went without which was freeing.  Instead, I remembered a place that sells delicious pumpkin spice lattes.  We ordered them and savoured them for our last hour of walking around.  I didn't do a combo-bolus.  In fact, I didn't do anything.

When the night had fully set-in, we knew it was time to return home.  Husbands and daughters were waiting for us. 

They were waiting for two dear friends to turn back into carb-counters, bolus givers, site changers, medical supply order'ers', boo-boo kissers, magic makers and especially mothers.

Which we happily did.

And without guilt.

Because being the best carb-counters, bolus givers, site changers, medical supply order'ers', boo-boo kissers, magic makers and especially mothers, means that I needed a day off.


laura said...

Amen sista!

Naturally Sweet Sisters said...

LOL! I think this is by far the best compliment ever! Thank you for bringing me a smile:) Hopefully everyone connected to caregiving can get at least one day off. We all deserve it. xxoo

Bilquis said...

Loved reading your day off... I got only a few hours off yesterday :-) when I decided to head out and spend some time with a friend (first time in last three months) and yes I felt GOOD. Completely relate to what u feel.... :-)